He doesn’t know how to use “the three seashells”???

17 04 2008

Ever since I saw the movie “Demolition Man”, I’ve felt like there was something missing from my life.

No, not glow rods… though you’ve gotta admit, that’d be a GREAT item to have at parties. Who wouldn’t want to use a stun baton on their friends for some hearty laughs? Also, I’ve always wanted to have a car with “security foam” in it should I ever get in an accident. I think the only reason they haven’t made that stuff a reality yet is because people would crash their cars on purpose just to experience the joys of security foam.

Still, putting the glow rods, security foam and even fancy Taco Bells aside, there was one unanswered question from Demolition Man that has continued to haunt me for years. The mystery of the Three Seashells. For the uninformed, Demolition Man takes place in the future and, in addition to the aforementioned technological advancements, toilet paper has become a thing of the past. Instead, people in the future use three seashells. Don’t feel bad if this confuses you, Stallone never figured out how to use them in the movie either.

Thankfully, in a recent interview, Stallone says one of the writers explained to him the general gist of how one was supposed to use the three seashells when taking a dump. With this newfound knowledge, the guys at i-mockery.com have created this handy illustrated instructional guide which clearly explains how to use the three seashells. Yes indeed, all of your questions are finally about to be answered!

Now then, don’t you feel better knowing that when you visit a restroom in the future you won’t have to deal with the embarrassment of not understanding how to use the three seashells? Of course you do!

Thanks to “i-mockery.com” for the pic 🙂



3 responses

20 04 2008

😀 Awesome! I always wondered how they worked. Mmmm Sandra Bullock.

20 04 2008

Yup…. now you can tell all your fellow students and save cash on toilet paper 😛

3 04 2009

Step 5. Clean hands with toilet paper.

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